Lifestyle

Welcome to another edition of #CookWithMii, and a belated #PiDay to my fellow bloggers!

Yesterday Matthew, I was…” If you don’t know the famous quote from ‘Stars In Their Eyes‘, you’re too young for yourself, bro/sis!

Anyway, “I was… R Kelly” as he turned on the Ignition when making the above (pictured) Pecan Pie – 👀 at it, lookin’ all “hot and fresh out the kitchen”!

Without further adEU (‘Article 50’ MAY be the WURST article ever written), let’s (Nintendo) console each other as we read this recipe! 

Curst a little bit more:

  • 2.5 cups all purpose / plain flour or more
  • 1 packet of unsalted Lurpak butter (FYI: LurPAKS a 👊)
  • 2 tbsp granulated sugar
  • A pinch of salt (refrain from sprinkling this like it’s glitter because: #Cholesterol)
  • 8 tbsp cold freshly-squeezed pineapple juice

CONCENTRATE: try to make sure the juice you’re using is NOT CONCENTRATING!

Can you ‘Fill Me In’? 💖:

“Could the REAL (Slim) Shady of Maple Farms PLEASE STAND UP?!”

Make Me Baby, (Ohhhhhhh Yeah)! 😉💖:

Mix the flour, sugar and pinch of salt thoroughly, then grate the frozen butter into the flour mixture with your preferred grater (a hand grater, box grater or potato grater’d do).

PRO TIP: STOP, collaborate and listen  between grates ‘cos all that grating could start to grate on you!

Once you’ve combined the dry ingredients and the butter, toss lightly with your fingers until they are all thoroughly combined.

Sprinkle or PWOAR 😍 the pineapple juice (or water if you’re not keen on pineapple juice) to the crumbly mixture until you can form a nice dough ball.

Divide (can’t go THREE MINS w/o mentioning Ed Sheeran!*) the dough into two parts – one slightly larger then the other. Larger part will be the base of the pie and the smaller part will be used to top the pie.

*about that, the #ShapeOfYou = 😍 #FOreal #MakeLikeABaeAndLEAF! Actually, don’t 🍃, #StayWithMii 😍💖

Wrap them in a plastic wrap; flatten and leave it for min 30 minutes or overnight in the fridge or the “refrigerator if you’re into a “what’s cooler than being cool? ICE COLD!” Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Resting will tenderise the pastry and make it easier to roll… Remove pastry from the fridge and let it to warm slightly.

Flour the surface of the worktop, rolling pin, your hand and the pastry.

Roll out the larger pastry in to a disc that is a little larger then the 8-inch pie dish so that it over laps the edges.

Place pastry onto the bottom of the dish by folding the pastry in to quarter and unfolding it into the dish.

Poke holes on the bottom of the pastry with a fork.

This is ‘Another Level’ of simple!

‘Cause YOU Make (Mii) Fill (Like A Natural Woman):

Preheat the oven 180 celsius.

Mix well all the filling ingredients then place them into the baking dish with pastry lining.

Roll out the rest of the pastry and cut then into 1-inch wide stripes then place them diagonally with 1-inch gap. Repeat the same horizontally to create a criss-cross basket top as pictured.

Place on the dish onto the bottom rack of the oven and bake for 35-45 mins depending on the strength of the heat in your oven.

Mine took roughly 30 minutes to go golden brown, that’s ideally what you’re looking for…

Although I made sure to turn my oven off after I saw it looking 50 Shades of Golden Brown, I kept it in there to sit in its juices for another 25-35mins. *OVEN OFF / KEEP IT IN*

Once it’s out, let it rest for 10  mins, then dust with icing sugar or whatever you’d like to garnish it with (before serving) – I chose desiccated coconut because I LOVE a good coconut!

Extras:

I consumed the contents of my Pecan Pie alongside a scoop of homemade Frozen Yogurt.

The recipe for Mi FroYo?

Oikos Coconut Greek-Style Yogurt INSIDE OF a freezer… #BoomBoomBoom 💖

Disclaimer: it’s rather moreish so be prepared for it to go in less than 24 hours!

Also, you don’t need to include bananas… I added them because they thicken the texture, giving a smoother, creamier flavour.

💋💋

firecracker-chicken-tall.jpg

Have you ever wanted to burn your tastebuds RIGHT OFF before the food even reaches your stomach? Yeah, me too…

OMG! TWINS! 😂

Today – tonight, this evening, this day, this time, right now, I’ll be showing you how to recreate the marvellous Firecracker of a meal, at home – in your kitchen and fridge, on your kitchen counter, on your stove, in your oven…`

I love Wagamama. I love my mama (who is not a WAG) so much that I’m practicing making meals from there (at home and in her honour).

The basics:

Wagamama’s Firecracker IS NOT for the faint-hearted or spice-a-phobes.

How spicy is it (out of 5)?

Try ten, like you, ’cause you’re WEEEEEEEEELL fit.

It used to be my absolute favourite meal, because I love spice. It must be down to spending 5 years in Sierra Leone where they *probably* have scotch bonnet in their cereal.

C’est La Vie…

As no-one from there (Sierra Leone) has ever said and probably won’t ever say: “Make like a tree and (Cassava) Leaf what you’re doing and come to me, OK(ra)?” 💖

I love you for getting this far on in this post. You’re a keeper (#GOALS).

How did I come up with this recipe?

HAHAHAHAHA, I could lie and say my Heston “Bloomin’ (tell)tale” senses were on top form when I last tasted it, or I could be honest and say I looked up a recipe on http://www.google.com/iloveyou and came across it… I’ll stick with Bloomin’ (tell)tale, ’cause it’s not like you’re going to send me on Jeremy Kyle or Judge Rinder, is it?

What ingredients will you need?

Chicken #MarinationForTheNation:

  • 1 tbsp oil
  • 1 red chilli, chopped finely
  • 1 tbsp chilli sauce – I used Sriracha
  • 2 garlic cloves, peeled and minced
  • 4 tbsp brown sugar
  • 3 tbsp light soy sauce
  • 2 tbsp dark soy sauce
  • 2 tbsp ketchup
  • 1tbsp malt vinegar
  • 1 tbsp tamarind paste
  • 1 tbsp fish sauce
  • Pinch of white pepper
  • 3 medium sized chicken breasts (fat removed), sliced into bite-size chunks

Stir it until it’s fried (Stir Fry):

  • 1 tbsp oil
  • 1 medium white onion, peeled and sliced into wedges
  • 1 red bell pepper (seedless), chopped into chunks
  • 1 green bell pepper (seedless), chopped into chunks
  • 1 cup of mangetout/snow peas
  • 12 dried arbol chillies
  • Small bunch of spring onions/scallions, chopped
  • splash of water (don’t need to but can do)

“YOU JUST GOT SERVED!” (to serve):

  • Boiled long grain rice
  • 1.5 tsp shichimi powder (click here to purchase the HECK out of it)
  • 1 tsp black sesame seeds
  • 1 tsp white sesame seeds
  • Wedge/s of lime

How to make it (“RAIN” in an Instant 😍):

Place all of the marinade ingredients into a large mixing bowl and do what it’s used for: mix! It’s all in the wrist action, “bae” leaf! 😉

At some point, you’re going to want to add the chicken and later cover with cling film (the thing you use to cover freshly done tattoos/sandwiches for a packed lunch) and leave to marinade in the fridge – unless you fancy salmonella-ella-ella-eh! or e-Col-eslaw-i, in which case keep it outside – for at least an hour (or overnight preferably, for a better and more succulent taste).

Cook your rice (for every cup of rice, two cups water).

Whilst the rice is cooking (and Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson is smelling it), heat the oil on a high heat in a WOK (not Gok Wan, I get confused too, it’s okay) or large frying pan/skillet until hot.

At this point, you should really be thinking about taking the chicken out of the marinade with a slotted spoon and cooking it in the wok until slightly browned, and almost cooked right through.

Add the chopped onion and cook for a further 2 minutes to soften the onion slightly and go golden – you should know the difference between golden and cremated… If not, here’s an idea: think Beyoncé and JLO (golden glow) and think the sky at 4:30pm in UK Autumn and Winter (black).

Add in the marinade sauce and warm up whilst stirring, it’ll start to boil and bubble, toil and no trebble #AllAboutTheBass.

PRO TIP: it’s VITAL that you cook the  sauce through completely, because raw chicken was in it. Don’t forget or else an unforgettable case of food-poisoning will occur and no-one/thing wants that, not even your toilet!

MC Hammer said it best when he said: “STOP! It’s PEPPER time!” Yeah, add them in, along with the mangetout/snow peas and dried chillies – it’s what your Firecracker dish (and Wagamama) would’ve wanted.

Cook these for a minute (three LESS than it took Justin Trousersnake and Madonna to ‘Save the World‘), then stir through the spring onions/scallions. Add a splash of water to the sauce if it needs loosening up.

Check one of the larger pieces of chicken to ensure it’s cooked in the middle, you can pierce it with a fork for clarification. If it’s cooked through, you’re granted permission to turn off the heat (unless you fancy overcooked/burned chicken, to each their own).

Now’s the time where you turn your dish into the plate you get at Wagamama. “HERE’S ONE I MADE EARLIER!”

Layer your Firecracker chicken curry sauce on the plate.

Take your boiled rice and spoon it into a small bowl. Push it down with the back of a spoon, then place a serving plate on top and turn the whole thing over. Tap the bowl to release the mound of rice.

Finally, sprinkle the top of the rice with the shichimi powder and the sesame seeds and top the rice with a wedge of lime!

Do I really need to tell you to: set the table, close your curtains, dim the lights, light some candles, pop a cork, pour the contents of the bottle into a glass, lay the table, get some cutlery (or else it won’t eat itself), and reminisce about the good ol’ times you ate – or didn’t eat it – at Wagamama as you tuck in? No, didn’t think so…

 Bon appétit, mon cheri! ❤️

I bit the bullet (in tattoo needle and kit form) by getting a TATTOO. Look, St Paddy McGuiness Day might be coming up on the 17th – but for me, every day is a four-leaf clover day!

I got it done by a really talented tattooist in West Hampstead. I’ve been going for consultations for years and end up chickening out last minute (literally) by ending up in Nando’s (bae) or KFC.

I’ve had an intention to get a particular four-leaf clover design for months (seen above), but today, I just thought: ‘if I don’t do it now,  I’m never going to do it’.

Tattoos are for life not just for Christmas, birthdays, Magaluf holidays and drunk nights out… So, you’ve got to make sure it’s something symbolic, meaningful and that you can look back on in years to come and not think: ‘FML!’.

img_4600

A four-leaf clover is 🍀 symbolic of good luck, and each leaf symbolises something. Faith, hope, love and luck. We all need these things in our lives. So, it was the best design for me. Also, I figured that black tattoos always fade to green anyway, so if I get a green tattoo what’s the worse that can happen? 😂 Besides, I’ve heard that there’s an awesome tattoo ointment out which keeps tattoos from fading. The phrase: “there’s a gel for that!” applies. 💖

So, the “aftercare” (not the aftermath of Jeremy Kyle) involves me waiting three hours for it to soak in all the colours, then I’ll rinse it with water, apply some cream (Bepanthan), and wrap it up in clingfilm again until the 8th hour (like you would a sandwich). Apparently, you do this for three (regular washes and cream applications) – so that it doesn’t dry out…

PRO TIP: wait for your skin to start tightening on and around the tattoo, that’s the best time to apply the cream; it’ll start to feel a bit stingy and sore.

The all important QUESTION: “did it hurt?” Frankly, no it didn’t. It stung when the outline was being done but the rest was fine, just like a small (albeit deep) scratch.

So, do y’all think I can join that band ‘t.A.T.u’? All the things I said… All the things I said… (preferably without the rainy day and passionate kissing behind the caged fence in a school uniform).

Things not to do after getting a tattoo:

Don’t go in the sun for a few months, if you have to – apply a HIGH SPF sun protection.

Don’t scratch it, no matter how itchy it gets – don’t.

Don’t pick at the scabs either.

Don’t rub or touch it often, especially when it’s in the first stages of healing – you could rub the colour off or get it infected.

img_4445

It’s #NationalToastDay and I came home to make some French Toast.

It’s not March yet so I’m trying to get as much chocolate crammed into my system w/o bringing on the old diabetes.

So, anyway, the recipe is as follows…

Ingredients:

1) A slice (or 7,890) of Genius Protein Bread (no, really – it’s called Genius!) 🍞

2) Alpro Chocolate Soya Milk 🍼

3) One Organic Free-Range Egg – straight from the hen (or the shop IF you don’t live in a barn) 🍳

4) Ground Cinnamon

5) Coconut Oil/Sunflower Oil/Low Fat Butter (ONE OF THESE, CHOOSE YOUR PERFERRED) for frying.

Method?

Beat egg and add milk, mix, then dip the bread in a bowl to coat. 🍳 🍼

Fry on a medium heat (but let the pan heat up, and allow the oil or the butter to melt/boil before adding the soaked bread) 🔥

Keep flipping the slice of bread from side to side until you’re happy with how it looks. I flipped it four times (once per minute).

Serve with some strawberries and a piece of Lidl’s finest crispy white chocolate (if you’re me). 🍓 🍫

*** You could also add Chocolate Sauce if you want to give yourself even more of a sugar rush and tempt fate of the diabetic variety.

Tonight, I’m going to do this #NationalPizzaDay differently…

The video above shows you how to make heart shaped pizzas, because Valentine’s Day is coming up soon – and everyone loves a pizza, right? Yes, yes they do!

Enjoy this video… If you decide to make your own, using the recipe shown, please let me know what you thought and how you found it. Comment below either way, I love a “chinwag paddywag give a cat a stroke!”

What’s your favourite pizza? I’m talking chosen restaurant, flavour, topping, crust… The lot! For those of you who – for allergy reasons – can’t eat it, or are just simply not a fan – what do you perfer as a substitute? Get involved if you want to. I look forward to hearing from you!